


Give me a reason.

by Lmaooooonade



Category: Gorillaz
Genre: Because of Reasons, Emotions, F/M, Its gonna hurt later, Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-22
Updated: 2018-11-23
Packaged: 2019-08-27 11:10:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16701385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lmaooooonade/pseuds/Lmaooooonade
Summary: Murdoc Niccals has not had a gentle or kind life, and admittedly he has been somewhat of a bastard. But when he meets Teddy, he gets a tad more than he bargains for after a one night stand.{First chapter isn't gonna hurt, but the next one is.}





	1. Two Satanists walk into a club--

* * *

Life had decidedly not been very kind to Murdoc Niccals. From his birth onwards it had been a total shit show and he had a sneaking suspicion it would be until he finally died.

The band had gone to some kind of party, minus Noodle, of course, he wasn't the best person but he wasn't going to expose her to the over-indulgences that happened at wild parties.

But there she was, dancing her hair long and flowing as she danced there like nobody was watching. Honestly, Murdoc had overlooked her at first, he was busy tending to his drink. But he heard 2-d talking and leaned in when he noticed him pointing. “The girl with black hair? She's got a pendant as you've got on!” He pointed out, Murdoc squinted and looked at her, she indeed did have the same thing, and that was enough to pique his interest in her.

Murdoc's eyes traveled her body,  tight black pants, and a black bralette underneath a black longsleeved shirt. He took her as a wannabe satanist at first. You know, one of those bored college kids who wanted to make their parents squirm at holiday dinners? But what the hell, maybe she was freaky, it was worth a shot.

He head that way, abandoning Russel and 2-d. “Shit, man.” Russel said. “Let me know if he leaves with her, cause we are gonna need a cab home if he does.” He said, 2-d nodded, he'd keep an eye on the situation.

Murdoc had witnessed multiple men dancing up on her only to be ignored, get discouraged, and leave. But he was determined not to be ignored, as a matter of fact, he was going to get this girl in bed if he had anything to say about it.

He came up behind her and begun to dance with her, making sure his presence was known by a uh, friendly touch to the side.  This caused her to whip around to look at him, she had turned so quickly that her hair flipped over her shoulder and rest on her chest. “Uhhhh, do I KNOW you? You look familiar!” She asked loudly. Oh, this was gonna be fun.

“Maybe you 'ave heard of my music, love!” He said to her, he swayed a little, noticing that she still hadn't completely stopped dancing. She ran a hand through her jet-black hair and moved to the beat of the music.

“Really? Are you like, famous?!” She asked him, she looked him up and down, the colored lights kind of obscured his skin tone, she wasn't quite sure.

Murdoc rolled his eyes and leaned in, speaking so she could hear. “Murdoc Niccals, Bassist of Gorillaz and all around God, at your service~” he purred. The girl laughed at him.

“Sure? Cause like, you don't look like a God! But that's cool, we can dance anyways!” She teased, as she turned back around and danced against him. He groaned and complied, attempting to entice her with light, fleeting touches here and there, trying not to get his nails caught on that damn fishnet top she had on. Her nails were long and black and sharp themselves, and he wasn't quite sure how she had gotten it on with those things.

A few songs later she was face to face with him in an alley behind the building the party was in. They could hear the music thumping from inside. They were bathed in the yellow-orange light from the lamp near the doorway as she leaned up against the brick wall, he stood in front of her and approached her,  but she held out her pack of cigarettes to him. “Here.” She said, and while he was a tad discouraged, he took one.

“Thanks.” He said, watching her take one out and settle it between her painted black lips. She pat down her pockets, unable to find her lighter.

“Kidding me?” she muttered, but Murdoc pulled one of out his jacket pocket and lit his own. She took the opportunity to lean in close and light hers, pulling away once the deed was done. “Thanks, man.” She said playfully, leaning back against the brick wall again. “So you play music, yeah? Gorillaz was it?” She asked.

“Exactly, love, nice memory.” He said with a smirk.

“Like, Demon Days, Gorillaz?” She asked, blowing a close of smoke around them.

“Oh- yeah? What- what other Gorillaz would I be talking about?” Murdoc asked, getting a little heated about that.

“Cool it, old man, I'm yanking your chain.” She said with an eye-roll. “I just wanted to see how you'd react, Murdoc.” She purred.

“Old man?” He asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Older than me anyways.” She snorted.

“Listen here, girl, I don't take too kindly to being called old.” he said with a frown.

“Hey, relaaaax, you wear your age well.” She teased. “And it's not ‘girl’ it's Teodora. Teddy for short.” She added.

Murdoc chuckled. “Right then, Teddy.” He said, looking her up and down. “And just who did you sell your soul to for a body like that?” He asked.

Teddy laughed, giving a little snort. “This is aaaaalllllll natural.” She said, motioning to her body with her hand.

“Could have fooled me, only Satan could make something like this.” He said.

Teddy rolled her eyes and took a long drag. “Sooo, Murdoc Niccals, wanna get outta here?” She asked, crushing the end of her cigarette against the wall, putting it out before she flicked it into a puddle not far away.

“That's typically my line, love, but yeah I do.” He said, finishing his cigarette.

The two left together in Teddy's vehicle, Murdoc carelessly took the keys to his vehicle with him, leaving his bandmates stranded and having to call on a cab. But it was okay because 2-d had his wallet, which had enough cash in to pay them off the tab and the cab.

 

 

Teddy and Murdoc enjoyed a rather exciting and incredibly unsafe night together. In the light of the morning, he discovered her body was inked in satanic symbols, and her place had plenty off occult things as well as a bunch of literature denoting a complete devotion to the faith.

For a moment he thought they truly were a match made in Hell, but then Murdoc remembered; he didn't do love. Love was not for him. He got out of the bed which woke Teddy up, and she sat herself up. “What time is it?” She asked, rubbing her eyes.

Murdoc looked at the alarm clock from where he was. “Nearly 10.” He said.

“Ugh, thank Satan the library is closed today or I'd die.” She muttered, getting herself out of bed. “Did you need a ride back to the place to get your vehicle?” She asked him as she took a look at her face in her vanity mirror. “Yikes.” She muttered as she pulled a makeup wipe from a package and began to clean her face.

“Yeah, unfortunately,” Murdoc admitted, as he looked around for his clothes, he saw the panties he had, well, ripped off of her last night and stuffed them in his jacket pocket while she was cleaning her face.

“Alright. Give me twenty minutes.” She said with a yawn. “Help yourself to anything in the kitchen.” She said as she sat at the stool in front of her vanity.

“Alright, fine then.” Murdoc said, making his way out to her kitchen. He found himself something to eat, though this girl didn't seem to have a scrap of breakfast food anywhere in this place. He just enjoyed some cold leftovers from the fridge. He wasn't sure what it was, but it smelled fine, he was too hungover to taste anything, though.

After a while she came out, dressed, makeup done, hair tied up. “You ready to go?” She asked, grabbing her purse.

“Yeah, hey, Teddy? Is it Teddy? Are you allergic to breakfast or something?” Murdoc asked her as he stepped towards her.

“I don't eat in the mornings.” Teddy admitted. “Breakfast for me is usually a soft drink and a cigarette.” She added.

“That sounds horrible… You should have breakfast it's important.” He said, admittedly he should  NOT be the person giving this speech by any means. Murdoc rarely woke up before noon, breakfast typically was had between two or three am and usually with his bandmates or some bimbo from the pub.

“Yeah? I'll consider that.” Teddy snorted as they head out to her vehicle. It was a little black hatchback, Asian made thing. It was cute for a girl like her.

The car ride was silent, the CD of her radio was spitting out tracks from Demon Days. Must have just been something she happened to listen to a lot because he didn't see any other hint of different CDs in her car.

Teddy pulled up next to his vehicle and smiled as she unlocked the door. “Have a nice day, Murdoc.” She said softly. He muttered something under his breath that sounded like  _ I shouldn't do this _ and leaned in, planting a kiss on her lips. Teddy kissed back slipped something in his pocket while he was distracted. “Mmm, you should go.” She said softly after breaking the kiss off.

“Yeah, I should. Have a nice day, Teddy.” He said as he exited her vehicle. He got into his own and they headed off in different directions.

When Murdoc got back to the mansion he felt in his pockets and discovered that he indeed had left his wallet with 2-d like he thought, but that there was a suspicious card in his pocket. He looked at it, it had her personal number on it, and he smirked, the back of the card said in cursive writing “ _ Don't be a stranger.” _ He just went to his room and tucked it away, he would visit her in his sleep, but seeing her again was out of the question, attachments led to disappointment, and Murdoc Niccals was not a man you disappointed.

 

Teddy found herself waiting for him for a few weeks before she tried to forget all about him, getting on with her regular life of being the odd librarian who dressed in all black and sometimes joked with the kids that she would put a curse on them if they brought food into her library.

Murdoc tried to forget about her too, she was the only girl who had been ballsy enough to slip her number into his coat pocket like that. She had also been the only other genuine satanist he had slept with in quite a long while. But he forced himself to push it out of his mind, he didn't do girlfriends, because he didn't do love, because love didn't exist.


	2. Two Satanists walk into a wine bar--

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time has flown, Murdoc is coming to terms with the fact he is no spring chicken and maybe needs to consider settling down, or at least give it a chance. He makes a call aand sets up a date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pregnancy loss is a theme in this chapter, please be concious of this, if it triggers you please skip this chapter!

A few years between then and now had passed, and Murdoc found himself going through his room. Now that he was out of prison he was struggling with a few things. He was a tad old to be having a midlife crisis, but here he was, having one anyways.

He found the card in his underwear drawer, he thought this to be an odd place for it, but he shook the thought off and remembered her after seeing the cursive writing on the back. “ _ Don't be a stranger. _ ” He licked his lips and had thoughts of her, could someone like Teodora ever actually like him. Nonsense, a girl like Teddy would be lucky to have a man like him. A man like Murdoc Niccals was top tier, yes sir he was, thank you very much!

He looked at the numbers he had dialed on his phone, making sure it matched the ones on the card. His gut told him that she would answer, but the tiny bit of doubt at the back of his mind said she would not. He hit that dial button and brought it to his ear.

 

_ Ring…    _

_ Ring…  _

_ Ring… _

 

“Hello?” A voice answered, it was a ladies voice but was it the lady he was looking for. 

“Is this, uh, Teddy?” Murdoc asked, swallowing a lump in his throat.

“Yes this is, who is this?” She responded, she sounded busy and he was kicking himself. Of course, he was an inconvenient bastard to call while she was in the middle of something.

“It’s Murdoc Niccals.” He said nervously.

“Oh? Wow, uhm… Hey? It's been a few years.” Teddy said. 

“Yeah, it has. So uh listen, love, I was wondering if you would like to join me for a drink this evening.” He said. He heard a chuckle on the other end of the line.

“You know what? Sure, I would love to.” She said, smiling a little. 

They arranged to meet at a quiet place, a wine bar in Venice. Imagine that, **the** Murdoc Niccals in a bloody wine bar? He never would have imagined.

Murdoc got himself ready, and he looked halfway decent, tight black pants and a black button-up, his signature cross on display. He cleaned up well, he had to admit. As he headed out the gang stopped him, harassing him over the look.

“Back off ya heathens, I got a date.” He said to them, he had to admit it was another thing he never really quite saw himself saying.

“Oh? Gross, don't get her pregnant.” Noodle said as she walked away, no longer interested in it.

Russel shrugged “Ditto that.” He said, following Noodle back to their game. Only 2-d seemed excited for him

“Nice goin’!” he said loudly, patting him on the back heavily.

“Lay off, 2-d, I gotta go!” Murdoc grumbled as he headed out. 

  
  
  


 

They both took their sweet time getting to that wine bar, Teddy wasn't sure that she should do this, considering what happened since then, but she went ahead with it.

They met inside and sat at a table towards the back, nice and private. She chose a nice red wine for them to enjoy, and they both agreed a whole bottle would be fine.

“So, ” Teddy started, looking him over. “What made you finally call?” She asked.

“I'm not sure, to be perfectly honest.” Murdoc lied, taking a sip of the wine.

“Well, I was kind of hoping you would call, I mean, it has been years, but I have something kind of unfortunate to tell you.” She admitted, taking a drink of her own glass.

“And that would be?” He asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Well, that ah, amazing encounter? It left me pregnant.” She said bluntly.

Murdoc felt an unusual surge of emotion, fear, shock, excitement? He was a father? He couldn't believe it.

“How is this unfortunate? I mean apart from me being absent from the lad's life thus far-”

He was stopped by the feeling of her hand in his, he looked in her eyes and felt his stomach do a flip-flop. “Murdoc, the child was never born. I had an ectopic pregnancy. I didn't have the baby so much as I had it removed.” She said.

“A what pregnancy, now?” he asked, he wasn't sure how to process what he was hearing.

“An ectopic pregnancy. It happens when a fertilized egg implants itself somewhere other than the uterus.” Teddy explained as she shifted uneasily in her seat. “They had to remove it.” She said gently. 

Murdoc felt an ache in his stomach. 

“Do you want to see it?” She asked

“Excuse me?” He asked back, what the hell did that mean.

“I was allowed to take a picture of it after they removed it.” She said softly. “And they actually uh, let me take it home. It's in a small jar on my shelf. It helped me uh, cope with the incident.” Teddy admitted.

“That’s weird, but alright, I'd like to see.” He said. 

“Photo or the real thing.” Teddy offered.

Murdoc thought on it for a second.

“Both if you'll let me take you home.” He said.

Teddy pulled her phone out and pulled the photograph up. In the photo was a metallic surface with a small, clear blob on it, and inside of the clear blob was a small, pink fetus. It made him uncomfortable knowing that his offspring never even made it past that.

 

  
  


Upon taking her home she brought him to her room and showed him the small jar with their child suspended in a preservation liquid. His face twisted as she set the jar in his hand. “Murdoc,” Teddy said. “Murdoc, you're allowed to mourn.” She said softly, watching him set the jar aside.

A grown man like Murdoc Niccals didn't need permission to cry, but having it certainly helped. Tears bunched up in the corners of his eyes and began to fall. Maybe this wouldn't have happened if he had just called back. Teddy sat next to him and held him close, letting him weep on her breast as he wrapped his arms around her. “Shhh, shhh…” she said softly as she rubbed his back, he gripped the back of her dress and just sobbed into the fabric of it.

He didn't know why he was crying, he felt like he didn't have the right. But Teddy just sat there and comforted him all the same. “I am so sorry.” She whispered, rocking him gently.

“P-poor lad.” He sobbed, his fingernails slightly tore at Teddy's shirt as he gripped the fabric of it. “He never even had a half a chance.” Murdoc hiccupped, Teddy knew this was some kind of projection onto their unborn child. 

She wound up laying back with him on the bed, letting him cry until he passed out. She just stroked his back as he slept and pressed the occasional kiss to the top of his head.

 

 

Murdoc finally stirred awake around 6 am, the harsh light day coming in through her windows. He had moved to laying on his back sometime during the night, and Teddy laid next to him, staring at her ceiling. He managed to sit hinself up and Teddy looked over to him. “How are you feeling?” She asked with a soft voice, she had dark circles from not sleeping.

“Like shit, love.” He admitted. Though he had fallen asleep after crying, it was not a restful sleep. It was flashback after flashback of crappy memory after crappy memory like he was strapped down in a seat in front of a movie screen. 

“You were mumbling all night, I was a little worried.” Teddy admitted as she sat up with him, brushing her fingers through her hair.

“You didn't sleep?” Murdoc asked, raising an eyebrow. “Well since you didn't sleep, you  _ have _ to eat breakfast with me, love.” He said with a nod, avoiding the subject of dreams. He plucked the small jar off the nightstand  and looked inside at the small fetus once more. He heard the voice of his father in the back of his head.

_ “It is what you deserve.” _

Murdoc shook his head and took it to the shelf. He noticed a blank space in a small shrine type set up and set it there. “Rest easy.” He mumbled. Behind him he heard Teddy fixing her makeup, she was shirtless when he turned to look at her.  “That's not quite appropriate for breakfast.” He purred.

Teddy chuckled. “I can't help that someone ruined my shirt.” She said.

“Hey, I'm not complaining, I think women should be able to walk around with no shirts.” He said, moving closer. “And don't worry about the shirt, I have a feeling I'll have a lot of replacing of your clothes to do.” Murdoc said deviously as he moved in and rest his head on her shoulder.

“Oooh, you're rather cheeky.” She said as she brushed a bright highlight over her cheekbones.

“Cheeky, trying to get between your cheeks, there's no difference if we're being honest, here.” He said, planting a kiss to her bare shoulder as he played with her bra straps. 

Teddy laughed a little and tapped his nose with her brush, getting the leftover product on him. “Let me get dressed.” She chuckled as she pulled away from him.

“It is a shame that society requires you to cover up all that beauty.” He groaned as he crossed his arms over his chest. “Where's the toilet, love?” He asked, he needed to snag himself some mouthwash.

“Down the hall. It'll be an open door.” She said as she rifled though her closet, he took a glance, unsure of how the hell she chose her clothes between with and black. But then he saw a mustard yellow cardigan in the mix and pointed at it. 

“Wear that.” He said before exciting the room. Teddy looked at it and nodded, pulling out a white shirt with a Peter pan collar, and right black pants. She slipped these on with some nice shoes before brushing her hair out.

Murdoc peeked in once he was finished in her rest room and smiled. “Ready to go, lovely?” He asked, looking her up and down. When she turned he saw the absolute picture of innocence and blushed a little.

“Yeah, let's go.” Teddy said as she grabbed her purse.

**Author's Note:**

> Next chapter will feature pregnancy loss. I'm warning you now.


End file.
